How to stop worrying about what others think

worrying about others

The desire to please others can be toxic if it leads you to sacrifice your own happiness. When you care too much about what other people think of you, it creates a cycle where the more you try to please others, the more unappreciated and unhappy you’ll become.

Often times when we want other people’s approval, we do things that end up hurting us in the long run. We spend too much time thinking about our friends, relatives, neighbours or what they might think of our work, our life choices, our partner, our physique, our career and everything in-between. This can lead to self-doubt and discouragement, which can further hurt our relationships with the people who are closest to us.

For example, if you find a partner that makes you happy and that you know is right for you, then be sure that only your opinion matters. No matter what people say or think about that person, in the end it’s only you who may live with them, marry them or spend most of your life with them and by their side.

Tips to stop wanting to please others:

Wanting to make others happy can be taxing and even dangerous. It encourages us to sacrifice our own happiness in the process.

However it is important to understand that someone, somewhere, some day will always have a negative thing to say. So to want to please everyone else but yourself, is not a task that you can really succeed in no matter how much you try.

Today, we have compiled few tips to help you stop worrying about others:

1. Spend a lot less time worrying about other people’ s opinions

2. Realise that your happiness and true wants really matter

3. Understand that you cannot please everyone at once

4. Stop waiting for others approval or permission before taking decisions in your life

5. Stop any fears of rejection or disappointment you may have

Keep in mind that people who want to please others at the expense of their own happiness, rarely achieve fulfillment.

In fact, the key to happiness is being content with yourself, your life, and what you have even if that’s not others’ idea of what’s “ideal”. This is why you must stop trying to please others and instead focus on what makes you truly happy and what would “ideal” for you. Focus on your definition of success, happiness and perfection rather than others’ idea of them.

This way, you’ll find contentment in how much you have already achieved in life and work towards something that can truly make you happy once you achieve it. In fact, some people end up having high-earning jobs that still do not make them happy because it was never their choice, passion or idea to pursue these careers anyway.

Do you want to be “good” or happy ?

The idea of being a good person is that you are always putting others first. You want to please them and make them happy. But in reality, this causes you a lot of stress, guilt, and fear of failing to please them. So, knowing this would you rather be considered a “good” person by everyone or be happy and content with your life ?

The answer should be obvious. There’s no gold medal for people that are considered to be extremely kind or everyone’s cup of tea. Indeed this type of people are more at risk of falling victims to scams or getting taken advantage of.

Everyone has different needs, wants, desires and goals in life. So no one can satisfy everyone’s needs at once. But we must remember that the most important person in our lives is ourself. If everyone focused on their own personal happiness then we can all be happy some day and content with ourselves. However, if we all focus on pleasing everyone at once it may never be possible because even people’s expectations of us may differ.

Check out this article about how to kindly reject other peoples’ expectations of you.

Bottom line:

The truth is that we cannot please everyone all of the time. The sad fact is that we cannot please everyone all of the time. There will always be those who dislike what you’re doing or what you’re saying – no matter how much effort you put into pleasing others.

In the end, it can be frustrating and devastating to spend all our lives worried about others and trying to achieve more to impress them only to find out that we cannot please everyone anyway. This can affect our mental health negatively when we turn around to see that we wasted all our life trying to please others rather than ourselves, and in the end others are not content nor are you happy.

For those who are perfectionists it can be tiring to always try to meet others’ expectations and even exceed them but in the end it’s important to understand that this is truly an impossible task!

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