The need to prove yourself to others can be very stressful and exhausting. It is a never-ending cycle of proving yourself to one person and then moving on to the next. The need to prove oneself is not limited to the workplace but also in social circles, as well as family life.
There are many ways that people try and attempt to get rid of this stress, but they usually fail because they don’t address the root cause of the problem. The root cause is that we feel like we have something wrong with us and we need other people’s validation or we need to prove them wrong because they treated us bad or didn’t believe in us.
Reasons not to focus on proving yourself to others:
1- You’re inviting negativity and hypocrisy in your life:
We should focus on self-compassion instead of self-obsession or trying to get others to talk of how great, smart, or hardworking we turned out to be. Nobody distributes medals for being the best provider or smartest person, in the end only you and your immediate family can benefit from your successes.
Others won’t be fallen at your feet or worshiping you, once you reach the peak of your success or career. In fact, a few may even be envious or jealous and wish bad upon you. So why invite that type of negativity into your life or invite hypocrites that are only respectful of you after your newfound achievements?!
2- You can never fully gain others validation or approval:
If you think that by having so much money or achieving something specific, you can prove yourself to others; you should know that you’re wrong. It is very hard to please everyone. Sometimes we focus all our hard work, blood and sweat on proving our worth to others and in the end that one thing we didn’t think about will be perceived as a flaw of us.
For example you could spend your life working hard to buy the house of your dreams, and prove yourself to others but when they see it of hear of it; they could think it’s horrible or that it’s not sunny enough or that where it’s located is trash. In other words, others may always have something negative to say that’s why you should not focus all your energy and efforts on proving anything to anyone but yourself!
People will always talk. You could be wearing a dress of gold and all the people in the room could be whispering and gossiping about how your hair is thinning, your bad breath or even how short that dress is… That’s why a person that like to please others, impress them or gain their approval may never succeeded. Too eager to please, too easy to wound!
3- Stop comparing yourself to others:
We are living in a world where people are constantly comparing themselves to others. We are constantly trying to prove ourselves to others and it’s not healthy. The need to prove yourself is driven by the fear of being rejected.
It’s important that we don’t let the fear of rejection drive our need for approval. It’s important that we don’t compare ourselves to others because there is no one else like us in the world.
The need for approval is fueled by two things: fear of rejection and insecurity about yourself. When you let go of these two things, you will be able to stop trying so hard and just be yourself. Check out our article on how to stop comparing to others, if you’re guilty of it.
4- You can validate yourself!
might be afraid of not being accepted or praised. Or they might be looking for validation.
But the truth is that you don’t need to prove yourself to anyone, because you are enough as you are. You don’t need validation from others, because you can validate yourself. You can accept and love yourself for who you are without needing anyone else’s approval first.
How about you be your own judge and give yourself a full 10 out of 10! There are some things that you may appreciate and like about yourself and for those you should be able to smile and think that you’re good enough as you are!
To yourself at least you must already be the funniest, the most caring, the smartest, the hardest working and even the most grateful for everything that you have and are. In this case, your own validation is the only type of validation you should ever seek!
5- You are already worthy:
This may not be a topic that you thought of, but it is a common struggle for many people. The need to prove yourself to others is often seen as an insecurity and can be the root of many troubles.
The easiest way to get rid of this need is by accepting that your worth does not depend on what others think of you. It does not depend on how much you accomplished and how much you achieved. There are people that will love you in poverty and wealth. They will love and care for you in illness and health. And these are the only people that should matter to you because to them you are valuable and worthy of love just as you are.
It is a common thing for people to feel the need to prove themselves to others. It is a feeling that many of us experience in our lives. Some people might feel like they need to prove themselves in their jobs, while others might feel like they need to prove themselves in their relationships.
It is important for us not to let this feeling control our lives and take over everything we do. We should be able to find ways to sit back, relax and enjoy our accomplishments rather than just want to do more and more to show others what we are capable of.
One way that people can get rid of this feeling is by finding ways of self-validation and self-acceptance.