A two-faced friend can make your life difficult, toxic or unbearable without being suspected or questioned. It is someone who you may not think of as a threat, at first.
For example, you may have a close friend that you trust endlessly and do everything with. But, they may secretly be consumed by jealousy and wish to see you in a difficulty.
In the end, there are many ways that a fake friend can show up in your life and turn it into a nightmare in a matter of months or years. And, at that stage, it becomes hard to get rid of the person in question, as they take too much control and settle in our daily routines.
For these reasons, it is better to recognize and catch a two-faced friend before they show their true colors. So, these are a few signs you should stay away from someone:
1. They act oblivious:
You should get something clear from the start: some people are genuinely oblivious to what’s going on around them. Although that’s not a good trait to have, they don’t mean to harm others or do anything bad on purpose. A deceitful person, on the other hand, does.
People who don’t genuinely love, but still feel the need to keep you around to feed their egos, have figured out a long time ago that pretending to be oblivious earns your forgiveness. So they may do something wrong, but if caught they will tend to act innocent or oblivious, rather than apologize.
Since you now know this, you can start paying closer attention when people are acting oblivious, and this way you should be able to see if they’re pretending or truly innocent. Soon enough you will be able to accurately figure out when a person is sincere sorry or just sorry they got caught.
Deceitful people also use obliviousness so they can show you in a covert way that you don’t matter that much. This is because they like to feel superior to others and make them explain things more than once, while they think of an appropriate excuse.
In short, being around a deceitful person is a waste of time and energy, because they will never get where you want them to be, despite your best efforts to help.
2. They are forgetful:
Since a deceitful person’s main goal revolves around themselves, it’s normal that they inevitably make mistakes, and show their true colors. If they’re not ready to let you go out of their lives, or are not done with you yet, they will simply claim that they have forgotten about what they did when questioned.
If you feel hurt or confront them in any way about a past mistake, they will make you feel like a crazy person. They will somehow make it sound like it’s your fault because you misinterpreted it all. Another thing that helps a deceitful person by acting forgetful is that it maintains an appearance of innocence about them. Think about it, if you can’t make them remember what they did wrong, you can’t even talk with them about it.
You simply give up because they act so innocent and, if this happens with someone you love, you feel compelled to let it all go to preserve the relationship.
3. They don’t offer help in a genuine way:
You want to be surrounded by people who genuinely care for you because you genuinely care for them. However, deceitful people tend to offer their help first, not because they care about your wellbeing and want you to feel supported, but because they want you to feel like you owe them something in the future.
Not only that, but they will also offer their help without being asked. By doing this, they are hoping to create a routine, where you will start to trust them and rely on their assistance. However, they will do it excessively. Even though you’re finishing a task or about to start doing something incredibly easy, they anticipate your moves and do those tasks for you. You will start depending on them, without even realizing it, because you will be clouded by the love you think they are giving you.
The way in which this behavior can ruin your life is that after spending so much time used to getting their help, this cunning and deceitful person decides to retreat. They slowly back out from your life and take away their help to punish you.
They will withhold their assistance, sometimes completely, leaving you without any support. In this case, don’t waste time trying to argue with them to get their help back, because it was all planned and they won’t feel remorse.
4. The exaggeration in flattery:
We’re so used to constant unnecessary rudeness in today’s society that we almost expect it and create a thick skin to ward it off. However, we are completely vulnerable when it comes to receiving compliments. A compliment is associated with good intentions, so we generally receive it without reservations, arms wide open.
Unfortunately, we could be so starved for compliments that, when we receive one, we don’t bother trying to tell if it comes from a genuine place or not. But very much like rude people in the world, there are plenty of people who offer compliments just to get something in return.
Deceitful people are masters at giving compliments. They spend time observing you, hearing about the things you like in life and your opinions. So, when it’s time to compliment you, it fits like a glove. You instantly feel that that person is the only one who truly understands you and you start trusting them.
When this happens, they can use the trait they always complimented on you as a derogatory one, leaving you confused and wanting to seek their approval again.
5. They seem to be excessively protective:
Protectiveness can be a disguise for manipulation. A deceitful friend will gladly say they care about your physical and emotional wellbeing when, in reality, they are trying to manipulate you to go in the direction they want you to go.
By saying they are worried when you go to a certain place or that they don’t like a person you associate with, they are trying to manipulate you into becoming more reserved and isolating you.