We can’t choose the people we love, nor can we force someone to love us, but there are some things we can do to make us shine in a brighter light in the eyes of a person we like for more chances to steal their heart.
Although it’s not guaranteed that the person you love or like will love you back, here are five rules you should try to follow to try and make someone fall in love with you. However, remember that you have to be genuine in the way you act. Only this way the other person will be able to know the real you.
Steps to make someone fall in love with you:
1. Be a good listener:
The more a person feels heard, the more they will see the importance that your presence has in their life. When we love someone and are eager to make them notice us, our first impulse is to endlessly tell them things and stories about our life.
Sometimes, we get so excited in doing so that it’s almost as if we are having a monologue and the other person is just standing there, waiting for an opportunity to contribute to the conversation. If you don’t restrain yourself in time, you could give the impression that you’re very self-centered, which is a turn-off for many people.
You should try to make conversation with the person you love yes, but let them take the lead too, once you asked them a question. Make sure you listen attentively to what they are saying and only comment on what they said after they finished. Avoid interrupting them as people don’t like to be interrupted, especially if they are telling something that excites them.
A good thing about listening carefully to what they said is that you will remember it later and surprise them, by showing how much you care for them.
2. Create a safe space for them:
We are led to believe by movies and fictional books that people sometimes feel more attracted to reckless and dangerous individuals. Well, you can forget all that because that’s not entirely true. While people still want a partner that excites them and adds vibrant colors to their life, that doesn’t mean that they are looking for dangerous people or a murderer.
When people picture the love of their lives, they think about someone who can protect them and support them in any way they might need. Check out this article on the role of a husband universally and what to expect from him, if you’re a heterosexual woman.
However, if you truly want someone to fall in love with you, the best way to do this is to show that you’ll always be there for them. Sometimes that just means being available to listen to their problems, other times it could involve doing something fun together. Either way, by becoming a safe space for a person, you also become reliable and trustworthy.
3. Be vulnerable in front of them:
One of the biggest obstacles to intimacy is the lack of vulnerability. It’s hard to let our walls down around someone. We are essentially showing them all our imperfections and flaws if we do. It’s true that they probably know that you’re not perfect, but it’s different seeing it with their eyes.
However, if you want to know someone fully and for them to be vulnerable around you, you will also have to actively show them that you can be vulnerable around them too. Once you both realize that knowing each other’s imperfections are okay doesn’t make you weak, you’re opening a door to let love be a part of the relationship.
We can only love someone completely if we love all the good and bad sides of them. But, of course, this doesn’t apply to toxic behaviors.
4. Don’t be completely honest about your feelings at first:
It’s a daunting feeling to confess our love for someone. The fear of rejection is very real because that’s a possible scenario. Although you might be tempted to tell them how you feel immediately, it’s not always a smart move and this might have the opposite effect.
Regardless of the other person’s feelings for you, confessing your love for them at the beginning of your relationship can be quite overwhelming. They might be pressured to try to love you back even though they don’t feel ready for it, which will only create fake interactions and stop them from being themselves.
Or, they might distance themselves from you because they felt scared about knowing that a person loves them in such a strong way very early on.
5. Show interest in what interests them:
People are aware that everyone has different opinions and tastes, so the person you love doesn’t expect you to copy their taste entirely. Nor should you do that, because you won’t seem as natural. However, you could still show interest in what they do and say your preferences without having to disagree with them.
A respectful conversation can go a long way when you’re trying to impress someone. People find it hard to be understood, so when you show an active interest to learn about the things they love, they will feel validated and value your time. You can also check our article on how long it takes on average to fall in love so that you have a better idea of how to play your cards right!