6 big signs she’s a player

signs she's a player

Sometimes, people don’t have the same expectations from a relationship. So if you recently got the feeling that the woman you’re seeing isn’t interested in evolving in moving forward as a couple, it can be puzzling.

The truth is that she could be playing you, and in that case, she’s not interested in being in a real relationship with you. Look for the signs below to make an informed decision about what to do in that case and as soon as possible.

A few signs that she’s a player:

1. She seems different when you meet in person:

If she is playing you, it means that she enjoys receiving your attention and does not necessarily like to give it back. And the medium that suits her best to do this is over the phone. She can quickly type an affectionate message or send you a sweet voice message to make you feel cared for, so she can keep receiving the attention she wants. She can even talk for hours on the phone late in the evening or at night when she’s bored or cannot sleep.

However, when you plan to meet in person and she agrees, have in mind the way she talked to you over the phone and compare it with how she talks to you face to face.

If she seems absent, more interested in her surroundings or her phone (again) rather than in having a good chat with you, then it’s a red flag. It means that she is not interested in making any effort to give back the attention she receives.

2. Whenever she contacts you it’s always because she wants something:

Whether you are beginning a new relationship or are just in the flirting or talking phase, it’s essential to have a balance of the attention and care that come from both sides.

You both want to feel wanted and loved so you go after one another mutually and try to be present in each other’s lives. If you see that this dynamic is extremely off-balance between you two, it could be a sign that she’s playing you.

Are you always the one who initiates conversations or suggests doing something fun together? If you have answered “yes”, think about whether she ever took the initiative to do it. Did it feel like she missed you and wanted to be with you when she last saw you or did she want something from you in the end? 

If she always asks you for a favor or something similar it means that she sees you as a resource or asset instead of a partner. She values what you can give her or do for her, instead of who you can become in her life. Beware, because as soon as you stop being able to do her favors she will reveal her true nature. Also what you give her could be as simple as an ego boost.

3. She’s doesn’t seem interested in your life:

When you are talking does it feel like she’s rushing you so she can get to the chase and start talking about her life and problems?

If so, it means that she’s not interested in your life and she’s playing you. It can even mean that she is not interested in you as a person, since you probably told her about your interests and she didn’t have much to say about it nor even pretended to care for long enough.

It’s also likely that she won’t remember everything you told her, so consider not wasting your time sharing too many personal things with her.

4. She keeps you in a bubble, away from other people in her life:

You probably feel like you know all her friends and family because you heard her talking about them so much, but you never actually met them have you?

Every time you make plans it’s always just you two and whenever you hear about her plans with other people she never invites you to come along. If you invited her to meet your loved ones and she always says no too, it means she’s actively putting you in a separate section of her life. This will allow her to get rid of you quickly and with no drama when she decides that she got tired of you.

She doesn’t consider you to be a real partner, as she only wants things from you, so she won’t bother to include you in her life in any real way, nor let you involve her too much in your life either. 

5. You’re always the one going to her:

Knowing that the person we’re interested in makes an effort to be with us is a great feeling, and we do that when we are interested in someone as well.

However, you have come to realize that you are the one who always makes plans to go meet her. This is a big red flag, in fact, we even have an article warning about friends that don’t reciprocate… But it’s worse if it comes from a partner or potential partner!

It means that she doesn’t have an interest in you as a person and she’s using you for the company to go places or to get attention and an ego boost.

6. She doesn’t want to publicly label you as her boyfriend:

One thing is to want to take things slow, another is to refuse to take any sort of step. If you have been in the same stage for months and she still doesn’t want to introduce you as her boyfriend to others, she probably never will.

It simply means that her interest was never to commit to a serious relationship with you, in the first place. If she could have her way, she would keep things as they are until she meets another person with whom she will truly want to be in a relationship. But one thing is for sure that person isn’t and will not become you, overnight!

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