It can quickly feel like betrayal has brought you to your knees when someone you’ve loved, trusted and crowned with marriage cheats on you. Getting over it might seem impossible. You may have known your cheating ex-spouse for years, hence picturing a future without them could be unthinkable.
But regaining inner peace and serenity is possible if it is done in time with gentle self-care practices. Try refocusing your energy on yourself and restoring your senses of worthiness and acceptance. If this is not enough, then follow the steps listed below one by one and see how you will gradually start feeling like yourself again.
As hard as it may be, you will look back one day and appreciate the multiple lessons you learned from working through the betrayal.
Is it possible to get over a cheating ex-wife?
Having a spouse cheat on you can be devastating and getting over the betrayal can take years of hard work. It can be incredibly difficult to forgive and move on, but it’s often necessary in order to heal.
It’s true that even for the toughest people, this is something that can be challenging to move on from and a tough pill to swallow. But that doesn’t mean that it isn’t possible. If you’re determined to make yourself feel better and move on from your circumstances, gathering all the strength and courage you have is key. Believe it or not, forgetting and even forgiving are achievable if you really try and put in the hard work!
While betrayal may haunt you forever, the journey of recovery is necessary in order to find peace and true happiness again. The first lesson though is that the journey starts with understanding that it wasn’t your fault before ultimately finding peace within yourself.
How to get over an ex-wife who cheated on you?
1. Understand why the relationship has ended:
The first step is to understand why the relationship ended and process the fact that it was not your fault in the slightest. It’s true that when divorce happens amicably or for reasons other than cheating, both parties would’ve played a role to some extent in causing the separation. However, this is not the case anymore when cheating is involved.
Nobody can be held responsible for having had a betraying partner that went behind their back and chose a momentarily pleasurable instant over the strong emotional bond they share with their partner. While it is hard to cut yourself some slack when overwhelmed by intense emotions; you’ll have to find a way to do that. You will have to gather your thoughts and be able to perceive how you’re truly not the one to blame in this scenario for any of it. This step allows you to learn from the experience and move forward in a more emotionally healthy way.
2. Accept your emotions and share your sorrow with a supportive person:
The second step on our list is to accept your emotions and talk to someone close about how you are feeling. Supportive friends or family members can be essential in helping one process their bad experiences and inner turmoil. Having someone who truly understands what you’re going through and can provide emotional support and understanding can be immensely helpful during this trying time.
It may feel daunting, but remember that everyone needs some measure of comfort once in a while. With the right amount of help and compassion, you might just find that you have enough strength to try and move on with your life. Also, keep in mind that the person or people that are helping you aren’t there to keep mentioning what happened or talking about the character of your ex-wife.
Instead, the focus should be to spend time together doing other things and to help you forget about it all. In other words, their goal should not be to remind you of any of it by talking about it in any way; which brings us to the next point!
3. Avoid talking ill of your ex-wife:
Our third key step on our list to help you move on from a cheating ex-wife is to avoid talking ill of her. Though it may seem therapeutic at the moment to badmouth her or tell others what she did wrong, it will only bring negative energy into your life in the long run.
Trying to exact some kind of revenge on your ex-wife won’t do anything except force negative energy into the universe. Remember that what goes around comes around, so if you talk plenty of ill about her there’s also the risk that it will come back to bite you in the butt later. Letting go is the only way forward and although it’s not easy; it is necessary.
As we said, engaging in negative behavior towards her might make you feel good but it also makes it even harder for you to move forward from all this. It’s a vicious cycle that can dig deeper wounds within yourself, causing nothing but despair and making you bitter in the long run.
4. Reconnect with yourself and rebuild an identity away from her:
The art of learning and releasing is an integral part of moving on after a marital breakup; especially if it’s due to your ex-wife’s infidelity. So while it may feel nostalgic to reflect on the identity you crafted with her, this isn’t time for pauses and reminiscence. Instead, try to reconnect with yourself as this should be your priority now, away from any influence she may have had on you when were together.
When we fall in love and then marry a specific someone; we slowly start to share the same likes and dislikes as them. This is because we gradually build our new world and new identity around them. However, if your ex-wife has cheated on you then it is time for you to reconnect with yourself and figure out your true likes, aspirations, and wants away from anyone else’s. Of course, this doesn’t mean that everything accomplished between the two of you has been wasted. It just means that life is offering you a chance to be your true self again without the influence of anyone else, especially not someone unworthy and undeserving of you!
It’s hard work but necessary to completely break away from any residue of an ex-partner so that you can rebuild your identity, free from theirs. As part of this reconnecting process, take some time for yourself, grab coffee with your old friends or pick up a new hobby! If you are honest with yourself, you’ll admit that your life now doesn’t match who you thought you would be at this age. Still, by reconnecting with what makes you truly happy, you can reclaim your own identity beyond the one created in marriage to accommodate someone that turned out to be so ungrateful in the end.