It’s no secret that first dates can be nerve-wracking. After all, you’re meeting someone new, and you want to make a good impression. And if you get too nervous you could easily start sweating, stuttering, or coming across as clumsy; which is not attractive.
However, there are a few things you can do to try to stay calm and collected enough to be able to formulate logical sentences and form thoughts, at least.
So if you finally landed that first date you’ve been dreaming about with someone you like and care about, here are a few rules to keep you from getting clammy hands, becoming very nervous, and messing it all up.
5 Steps not to get nervous on a date:
1- Remember that your date is only human:
First, remember that your date is probably just as nervous as you are and that they’re only human. They’re not a Greek god, an alien, or an unfathomable type of complex creature.
They’re a person like yourself who lives in the same era as you and probably does the same things you do on a daily basis, just slightly different based on their profession and living situation, etc. But all in all, they probably come across the same things as you and have a similar life to yours on many levels.
So, just like you, they are probably feeling just as nervous, if not more. This is why you should try to relax and be yourself. The worst thing you can do is try to be someone you’re not.
Be honest about your interests, hobbies, and anything else that might come up. Chances are, your date will appreciate your openness and honesty. Remember, first dates can be fun! Just take a deep breath and enjoy getting to know someone new.
2- Try to pick comfortable clothing for the occasion:
Another way to try and stave off those first date jitters is by picking out the right outfit. You want to be comfortable but also put together. So pick something that you can move and breathe in, but also makes you feel confident.
Another similar way to try and keep calm is by choosing a familiar place. A place where you know the menu and won’t have to spend 10 minutes trying to figure out what you want or getting nervous about it too. If it’s somewhere you frequent, even better. You’ll feel more at ease because it’s a comfortable setting for you.
in other terms, try to avoid anything that would make you too nervous or uncomfortable. This goes for conversation topics as well. First dates can be a little scary sometimes, but they don’t have to be. This is especially true and only made possible, if you go into it with the mindset of just trying to get to know the other person and have a good time, it’ll be much less daunting.
Try not to think of it as a make-or-break situation, because chances are, it probably isn’t. So relax, it’s not the end of the world. Plus, you’ll probably do great.
3- Prepare a few topics to bring up in advance:
A third rule that can help you to not get nervous during a first date is to prepare a few topics to bring up in advance. This way, if there are moments of awkward silence, you’ll have something to fall back on. But, don’t fall into the trap of trying to force or impose these topics on your date. Simply leave them as a backup to fight off awkward silences and never bring them up, in any other case.
You can also use these prepared topics as a way to steer the conversation in a direction that you’re comfortable with. For example, if you know that your date is interested in some type of sport or hobby, you can bring up a relevant article that you recently read.
Or, if you know that your date is passionate about cooking, you can ask them about their favorite recipe or restaurant. By having a few conversation starters ready, you can help to ensure that your first date will be smooth and enjoyable.
Finally, keep the conversation light and easy. Ask questions about your date’s interests and hobbies, and avoid talking about controversial or sensitive topics. If you can manage to stay cool, relaxed, and collected, you’re sure to have a successful first date. To help you further with this task, we recommend you read this article on things not to say or talk about on a first date.
4- Be yourself:
In the end, one of the cardinal rules of first dates is to just be yourself. This can be difficult, especially if you’re nervous, but it’s important to remember that your date is getting to know you, not some persona that you’re trying to put forward.
So, if you’re usually a quiet person, there’s no need to try to be the life of the party. And if you’re usually funny, there’s no need to tone it down.
Just be yourself and let your date get to know the real you. Chances are, they’ll appreciate it more than some false persona that you’re trying to maintain.