Infatuation is a state of mind that we all experience. It is the feeling of being head over heels in love with someone when in reality it’s just the intensity of an initial and superficial physical attraction.
We are all infatuated with someone or another at some point in our lives. The problem arises when we start to believe that infatuation is true love and it becomes difficult to get over it.
It’s not easy to get over an infatuation, but there are ways to help you move on from a silly childish crush. In today’s article, we will help you to do just that!
How to stop being infatuated with someone:
1- Avoid associating them with romantic scenarios:
Part of the reason why, sometimes, we get so infatuated with a person is not even because of who they are. It’s sometimes only because of the way we highlight their attributes in our mind, thus creating an enhanced image of someone who we think is the most perfect person on the planet.
However, it’s not very healthy to keep doing this for long, because as soon as we are forced to face reality, it could bring unnecessary heartbreak. We could come to see that our crush’s real character or personality has nothing to do with the ones that we gave them in our heads.
To avoid reaching that stage, you should start making an active mental exercise every time you think about that person. You should try to think of them as being someone more neutral, and even try to find unappealing flaws about them. Essentially, you have to try picturing the reasons why you wouldn’t date that person, let alone fall in love with that person.
2. You need to accept that love is not always mutual:
When you were in other relationships, didn’t you ever stop for a moment to marvel at the miracle that two people managed to develop mutual feelings for one another? If you think about it, it’s more common that one person alone will fall in love with someone who is not interested in them.
If this is your case, it doesn’t mean that you should try to make an effort to make the other person romantically notice you; unless they already are in a relationship or have directly told you that they aren’t interested in you. However, when it has become clear that you won’t be in a relationship with that person, as painful as it might feel, you can’t keep your hopes up that they will change their mind.
You need to accept that there’s nothing wrong with you, it’s just that people don’t always feel the same level of attraction to one another; which is okay. What you don’t want is to be a part of a one-sided relationship, as it can be painful, messy, and draining. Check this article on whether a one-sided relationship can ever work.
3. You need to learn to move on:
One of the reasons why you find it hard to move on is because, first, you need to deal with the feeling of rejection. It’s normal to have our ego bashed when we spent such a long time infatuated with someone, picturing how your life would be if you were together, just for them to reveal that they don’t see you the same way.
Our first instinct might be trying to convince them that a relationship with you would be a good idea because you can’t fathom how you will deal with rejection. But that’s exactly why you should learn to move on.
Would you like to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t love you as much as you love them? Wouldn’t it be better to wait for someone who could give you that and chase that opportunity instead? You can have that if you take one step each day to try to forget the way you felt for that person.
4. Share your feelings with someone else:
Finding someone with whom you can confide is a great way to distance yourself from an atmosphere full of infatuation to help you think more rationally. If you feel that you can talk with a friend about your feelings, don’t hesitate to do it. They will know that you want to keep it a secret until you are sure whether you should pursue that relationship or not.
Another positive aspect about confiding in a friend is that, since they aren’t the ones who are infatuated with that person, they will be able to give you better-founded advice. If they happen to know the person you’re taking interest in, it’s even better because they can give you their opinion about a possible relationship with that person based on their first-hand observations.
If your friend agrees that you should get over that infatuation, which friends usually do, they can give you rational advice to do so. They can also help you get in check with your progress, to avoid you making any slip-ups which would only delay your process of getting over someone.
5. Confront your crush:
You should only take this step if none of the above worked, especially if you have a sort of relationship or friendship with that person and don’t want to unbalance its dynamic. However, telling your crush that you like them in a romantic way will only be done if you are ready to accept rejection.
If the person you are infatuated with tells you that they were never interested in you and never will be, you will know that there isn’t any hope of ever being in a relationship with them. It might hurt hearing this, but at least you heard it from their mouth and you don’t have to waste waking hours overanalyzing signs that weren’t there.
And it is ten times better than letting yourself get led on. Check this article out to learn more about being led on and what it means when someone does it. Either way, make sure you get a straight answer and don’t leave room for being led on. In the end, you will be positively impressed with how easy it will be to get over them. once you know that there’s no hope.