The term “flirting” can be used in many different ways and can also refer to a wide variety of acts that are meant to suggest romantic interest or attraction. While these acts are generally harmless, flirting is an activity that may cause some embarrassment in some situations. It may also feel uncomfortable or inappropriate in certain situations.
While most people know that flirting can be considered offensive, many would like to be able to tell when someone is trying to hit on them. And, sometimes it can be confusing! While some people may have a natural inclination to be polite and/or friendly, many people find it difficult to take the first step toward being flirty or asking someone out.
In this case, they may be left wondering if the person they’re interested in is interested in them or just being kind. Sometimes if we misunderstand the interlocutor in this type of situation then it can backfire or make them angry or even offended.
How to know if someone is flirting with you?
Flirting is a form of interaction between two people that involves the exchange of pleasantries and gestures, and even physical contact. The purpose of flirting is to build attraction and give people an opportunity to get to know each other better. The act of flirting can be positive or negative, depending on the intention.
So how do you know that someone is trying to flirt with you?
1) Observe their body language:
The best way to determine if someone is flirting with you or just trying to be polite is to observe their body language. The more they open up, maintain eye contact, smile and take interest in you, the more it could indicate that they’re being flirtatious.
A person who is blatantly flirting with you will use a variety of techniques to try to get your attention and make themselves seem more interesting and attractive.
They might go for seductive looks, stare at you or pretend that they are interested in your ideas. Other people will use light banter, compliments, and other small touches to make sure that you notice them.
They may even say something like “I think we are going to be friends.” if they feel comfortable doing so, or if they feel they’re getting the green light to do more, from you.
2) How close do they stand or dare to get to you:
The importance of personal space is constantly on the rise, and it is becoming a primary factor in determining whether someone is being polite or flirting.
If someone is invading your personal space or getting a bit too close to you, physically, then they may be trying to flirt. If they touch your hands, back, hair, or some part of your body gently in some way, for any reason or excuse then they may be trying to get you to notice that they’re into you.
3) Do they flatter and compliment you?
A compliment is a kind of flattery but it’s not always made for the purposes of flirting. A compliment is a positive remark that shows that an individual regards another person in a positive way. It could be about their appearance, their achievements, or just about them in general.
However, more often than not people that compliment your looks and physique or how much of a good partner you’d be, for example, may be trying to flirt with you. They may be trying to imply that you’d make a good match for them or that they’d be please to be with you in a romantic way if you were open to it.
It’s not uncommon for people to use flattery to attract and get closer to a person. In the case of flirting, compliments are offered in a more direct way, most of the time.
How to differentiate between flirtatious compliments from friendly ones?
A good and friendly compliment should be positive, and not too personal. It should express how the person has improved their skills, how their work has improved over time, how they have exceeded expectations or any other general praise.
Being too specific or making a personal compliment about their character as a warm and caring person or about their looks can be a bit inappropriate. Or in a flirty type of setting it could be an attempt to hit on the person or to make them understand that we’re interested in them.
When you compliment someone in a friendly way, you usually go for something too broad like saying things like “you’re cool”, or “you’re hard-working”. Or it could be similar lines that try to say the same type of things.
Bottom line:
When you’re in doubt about a person’s intentions and what they mean, remember that the more we know people’s personalities and tendencies, the easier it will be for us to predict and guess their intentions.
So when you’re not sure, stick around and try to get more hints, to understand what they’re trying to say. You can also try your luck at flirting back with them, if you’re interested and see how it turns out. Keep in mind, however, that when the person is not interested in you flirting with them could be inappropriate and even offensive.
That’s why try to stay safe and decode the hints they drop properly if you fear rejection. Sometimes it could be easy to know if the person is trying to flirt or just being polite. It’s all about the tone, body language, and expressions used.