There comes a point in any relationship where you become comfortable with each other. You’re sure of each other’s feelings and you settle into a joint rhythm that allows you to live your life together in harmony. However, there’s a difference between that and being taken for granted.
If you feel like your partner is taking you for granted or underappreciating you, there are many things you can do to help him understand that’s wrong. No matter how many years you’ve been together, you both need to continue working on the relationship and make each other feel special.
When your guy stops doing that just because he’s comfortable in the relationship, it’s time to wake him up. To help you do that, here are 5 ways to help him realize that he needs you in his life!
5 Ways to help him see he needs you:
1. Remind him you’re a real person:
Sometimes we get so used to someone’s company, we forget that they have real feelings and emotions. This is particularly common in guys who take their women for granted. Being only physically there for you doesn’t mean he is fulfilling all your needs, particularly your emotional needs.
In fact, even if he’s physically present but all the way there mentally or emotionally, he’s still neglecting the emotional bond you two share. As such, it’s important to remind him of that. Being physically present with your partner is never enough when you’re lost in thought and barely notice their presence.
You can mirror his attitude and give him a taste of his own medicine to help him realize he needs to be present both physically and mentally. Or you can have a conversation about it and explain what’s wrong with his attitude.
2. Don’t be available 100% of the time:
One of the fastest ways to help him realize he needs you is to stop being there for him all the time. If you’re always there for him, make time for him, and prioritize him overall but if he doesn’t do the same, stop doing that and see how he reacts.
Don’t be at his beck and call even if you live together. Spend more time focusing on you instead of him and he will realize he needs your attention, love, and support in his life.
Spend more time with friends, take up a new hobby, take care of yourself first, etc. Additionally, have a conversation about how a one-sided relationship has been slowly developing between the two of you, as of late. That will help him open his eyes.
3. Spend less time with him:
If you usually never go out without him because you like doing things together, switch it up a bit. Go out without him and do activities without him. This will make him realize he needs your company and how much he has been taking it for granted.
He doesn’t feel like going to the movies with you? Go by yourself or ask a friend to go with you. You want to go out for some drinks and he wants to stay home? There’s nothing wrong with going with your friends again.
Retake some of your independence. When you come home talking about how much fun you had, he’ll kick himself for not sharing that with you and he’ll realize that he needs to step up.
4. Stop doing everything for him:
Women are often very nurturing. They feel good taking care of their partners and doing things for them. However, the moment he starts to take that for granted, you have to remind him you won’t always be there. This will quickly make him realize he needs you there.
It’s okay to let him handle things on his own. You can’t always be around or drop whatever you’re doing to support him. You’re not his maid, chef, or nurse though so be less tempted to put your life on hold just to babysit him. Let him go without your help more often than he’d like.
He can do things on his own; you serve him or help him because you want to, not because you have to. The moment he stops being appreciative and starts being demanding, cut it off.
5. Stop making excuses for him:
It’s not uncommon for women to make excuses for men. If he stops being as attentive as before, you chalk it up to him being tired or stressed. However, if that kind of behavior becomes consistent, it means he’s making a conscious decision.
Stop making excuses for him and tell him that’s unacceptable. Your relationship can’t survive that for long, so he needs to make an effort. When you bring the issue up, he will assess his attitude and the relationship. Hopefully, that will help him remember he truly needs you.
Conclusion:
All the steps listed above sound a little harsh and like they’re going to be counterproductive at first sight. However, a man that doesn’t realize your worth should not be dealt with gently.
Especially as this will send a message that you will tolerate and accept the bare minimum in your relationship. You can check this article out on why accepting the bare minimum in a relationship can only backfire and ruin it.
No matter how much you love him, don’t let him take you for granted or get away with not valuing you. In fact, if he persists and nothing works at all then you’ll have to check this article on why walking away is always an option when someone doesn’t value us.
You both need each other. If he’s slacking, help him realize how different his life would be without you and your love in it. Not in an aggressive way, but in a way that makes him understand that things haven’t been reciprocal and that’s not fair to you.