Ah, love. It’s what makes the world go round, or so they say. And while that may be true to some extent, when it comes to romantic relationships, love isn’t always all hearts and roses. In fact, for many couples, a large part of being in love is making sure that they’re always on their best behavior. They spend a lot of time thinking about thoughtful and considerate ways in which they can demonstrate their devotion to their spouses.
While this may seem like a lot of work, it’s actually a pretty natural instinct for most people. After all, who doesn’t want to make their partner happy? Plus, it’s a known fact that happy spouses make for a happy marriage. But sometimes, all this focus on pleasing our spouses can backfire. If we’re not careful, we can end up neglecting our own needs and wants in the process. So while it’s important to always be considerate of your partner’s feelings, make sure you’re not forgetting about yourself in the process and doing it the right way.
If you do it properly, your spouse will be happier than ever and deeply in love with you; while you also preserve your mental health, peace of mind, and well-being. So how can you please your spouse the right way and without stretching your limits too much? Read on and find out!
5 ways to please your spouse without jeopardizing your needs and health:
1. Give them space:
The first way to please your spouse is by giving them space and time to do their own thing. This will enable your other half to breathe a little and not feel suffocated by your constant presence. Plus it will give them time to miss you and crave seeing and talking to you again. You don’t have to vanish for days or weeks for this. Instead, this could be achieved by making sure you schedule “you” time.
Whether it’s a daily run, yoga class, or just some time to read alone, it’s important to have activities that are just for you. This will help you stay sane and avoid feeling too restricted or controlled by your spouse. Of course, it’s also important to be understanding if your spouse needs some “me” time too. Happy spouses tend to be those who have a good balance of together time and alone time. So if you want to keep your spouse happy, make sure you both have time for yourselves!
2. Make an effort to show your love through favors and actions:
If you’re looking for one surefire way to please your spouse, then you can’t go wrong with a little bit of effort. Whether it’s taking care of the kids so they can have a break, doing the grocery shopping so there’s food in the house, or even just folding their laundry for them, any act of kindness is sure to be appreciated.
And if you’re feeling extra generous, why not surprise your partner with a weekend getaway or a night out on the town? At the end of the day, it’s the thought that counts. So go ahead and put your best foot forward; your spouse will be sure to thank you for it.
3. Make sure you continuously demonstrate that you put them first:
Thirdly, what can never go unnoticed is if you continuously make your spouse your top priority! This could be key to a happy and healthy relationship. By continuously demonstrating that you put their needs and wants above your own, you are sending a strong message of your love and commitment.
This doesn’t mean that you should always agree with them or do everything they ask; that would be unrealistic and possibly even unhealthy. But it does mean that you should show them, through your words and actions, that they are your number one concern. When your spouse knows that they are your top priority, they will feel loved, appreciated, and valued, which are essential ingredients for a happy marriage.
So if you want to please your spouse, make sure they always know that they come first. Perhaps they won’t always come before your own needs as you also need to be well-rested, well-fed, and happy to a minimum to maintain a cheerful enough mood and treat them well. However, your spouse’s best interest and happiness should definitely come before anyone else’s for you because they’re your life partner and the one who will be holding your hand until the very end.
4. Show them that their opinion matters:
Fourthly, one of the best ways to please your spouse is to make sure that they know that their opinion always matters a lot to you. Whether it’s deciding what to have for dinner or where to go on vacation, never make a decision without consulting your spouse first. This doesn’t mean that you have to always agree with their opinion; rather, it simply means that their voice should always be heard.
If you can show your spouse that their opinion genuinely matters to you, then you will go a long way towards pleasing them. Another way to make them feel heard and valued could simply be to ask questions about their day and really listen to the answers. A good way to show that you’re listening is to summarise what they’ve said and reflect back on their feelings.
This lets them know that you care about them and that you’re on the same page. If you can do these things, then your spouse will mirror your efforts and start caring about you the same. They will also make sure to listen to you and make sure you’re always comfortable, happy, and content.
5. Make an effort to have calmer and more civilized disagreements:
If you want to keep your spouse happy, one simple last rule on our list is to not be a toxic or mean person. No one likes living with an ungrateful abusive spouse, so it’s important to do your best to stay in control of yourself even during arguments. Just because you strongly disagree with your spouse about something doesn’t mean you should hurt them with name-calling or resort to unforgivable acts.
Arguments are an inevitable part of any relationship. But there’s a right way and a wrong way to go about them. One of the quickest ways to turn a minor disagreement into a full-blown shouting match is to start hurling hurtful things at your spouse. Not only is this unnecessarily mean, but it will also make it harder to resolve the issue at hand.
Yelling can also be a major turnoff, so try to keep your voice down. If you can stay calm and avoid saying anything that you’ll later regret, you’re more likely to please your spouse; and reach a resolution that you can both live with.