If you find yourself constantly being the other woman, it’s time to take a step back and ask yourself what’s going on. There’s nothing wrong with having a few casual flings, but if you’re always getting fooled by married or unavailable men and end up being the one getting hurt, something is definitely wrong.

If you’re the other woman then you’re always second best, and eventually, you start to feel like that’s all you’re ever going to be. If you can’t seem to break out of this cycle, it’s time to take matters into your own hands. Chances are, you deserve better than to be someone’s dirty little secret.

So read more and take our advice on a few things you can do next to break the cycle.

4 ways to stop being the other woman every time:

1. Find the reason why you’ve been settling for less:

First, make a list of the qualities you want in a partner. Then, take a good hard look at the men you’ve been involved with and see if they measure up. If they don’t, it’s time to find the reason why you have been settling for less or accepting someone who’s already taken or unavailable.

Have you been fooled or lied to? If that’s the case, then it’s only your fault when you decide to stay after learning the truth. However, if you knew all along or from the start and still invested your time and feelings in such a relationship then you need to stop selling yourself short.

So, stop settling for less than you deserve. You are worthy of being the one and only and of being given all the love and respect a partner gets.

2. Don’t be afraid to stay single for a while:

The second thing you need to do is suppress any negative feelings that you associate with being single. You should never be afraid to be single for a while until you find someone suitable. Use this time to focus on yourself and what you want out of life, rather than jumping into the arms of the first liar or cheater that shows up.

Someone who took you in as the other woman is clearly a cheater and may cheat on you too even if you win him over from his other partner. So don’t take any chances and take the time you need to find someone decent and respectful. When you’re ready, the right man will come along.

There’s nothing wrong with enjoying your own company, and you don’t need a man to complete you. In fact, being single can be liberating; you can do what you want, when you want, without having to consult anyone else. So if you’re tired of being the other woman, embrace your single status and enjoy all that life has to offer.

3. Reassess your relationship habits and expectations:

Also, if you found yourself being the other woman more than twice, it might be time to reassess your relationship habits. Being the other woman could mean that you were not demanding enough which has allowed a man to make up lies and excuses and cover his tracks as freely as he wanted. If you had higher expectations and didn’t allow a guy to fully dictate and guide the relationship, then maybe you’d catch him earlier in a lie.

But, if you’re too submissive and easy-going, not only could you be lied to and taken for a fool but even a man who didn’t have another partner may find it easy to cheat on you. So ask yourself why you expect so little from someone you’re dating and why you feel intrusive and uneasy asking more questions.

Understand that it is your right to figure out exactly who it is you’re dating, so don’t be embarrassed for them or too scared to catch them in a lie. If you catch a guy you’re seeing in a lie, then good! At least, you’d know just what type of person he is. It is known that men like crazy women anyway, so don’t be afraid to be a little too fiery. And, don’t hesitate to get in your car or a cab and discreetly follow your man when you feel he lied about where he was going.

Also, if a man says that you cannot call him at a specific time of the day or that you can only text and communicate during specific hours then investigate and find out the real reason for this. Investigating when you have a gut feeling that something is off could save you years and reveal key truths earlier, which is always better!

4. Change your perception of things:

Being the other woman can be a thrilling experience, for some women, unfortunately. They get to feel desired and wanted in a way that they may not feel when they’re not “stealing” a man from someone else.

However, if you actually caught yourself feeling flattered for being the other woman then it’s time to reset your mindset and thinking. Being the other woman doesn’t mean that you took anyone from another woman. A man that is truly in love with his partner and is loyal and respectful will never be shaken or tempted even if all the women on earth plotted to seduce him. On the other hand, a cheater that is looking for any opportunity will give any other girl the time of a day.

In the end, think about it this way: if you’re really that great and amazing then doesn’t that mean that you should be able to be someone’s one and only? The true achievement in this regard is when you find someone compatible with you and who truly does fit all your criteria but still chooses to be with you alone freely.

Seducing and winning the heart of a man whilst he’s a bachelor or single and free is much more difficult, as he will be free to date who he wants and select the partner he likes most. However, distracting a bored and disloyal partner from the main woman in his life, whom he already spent years with, is not an achievement.

This is especially true because such a man would rarely be given any type of attention from other females that respect themselves. So if he’s given attention by another woman he may play the game and use her but with no guarantee that he’d even leave his main partner for her.

In fact, there are signs you could look out for to figure out if a married or unavailable man is using you because more often than not he would be! In the end, it takes a lot to walk away from a married man but it is always for the best, as there’s no fun or dignity in being the other woman and no woman should accept such a fate.