Should you date someone you’re not attracted to?

Should I date someone I am not physically attracted to?
This is a difficult question to answer. On the one hand, it can be difficult to build a lasting relationship with someone you’re not physically attracted to.

Over time, that lack of physical attraction can begin to wear on you and make it difficult to maintain your relationship. On the other hand, however, there are plenty of examples of people who have found happiness with partners they weren’t immediately attracted to.

In many cases, initial attraction is simply based on superficial factors like looks or height. But, once you get to know someone, you may find that you’re attracted to them in ways that go beyond simply physical appearance. It can all be very confusing when deciding whether you should be with this individual or not.

This is where we come in. In this article, we will give you reasons for and against dating someone you’re not physically attracted to. We will provide you with both options; the benefits and disadvantages. However, each individual is unique and ultimately, it comes down to you to decide whether or not you want to pursue a relationship with someone you’re not physically attracted to.

What is physical attraction in a relationship?

In order to answer this difficult decision, we must first attempt to understand what entails physical attraction. Physical attraction is often what first draws people together in a relationship. Put simply, it is the degree to which we find another person physically appealing. This can be based on any number of physical attributes, from someone’s looks to their body type to the way they dress and carry themselves.

It’s the initial spark that makes you take notice of someone and think, “There’s something about them I like.” Of course, there’s more to a lasting relationship than just physical attraction. But it is an important element, especially in the early stages of dating and courting. After all, if you’re not physically attracted to your partner, it’s difficult to imagine wanting to pursue a relationship with them.

Fortunately, physical attraction is often something that can grow over time. As you learn more about someone and get to know them better, you may find yourself becoming more and more attracted to them, even if they didn’t initially catch your eye.

Reasons for dating someone you’re not physically attracted to:

There are a lot of reasons to date someone you’re not physically attracted to. Maybe they make you laugh, or they’re super smart. Maybe they have a great job, or they’re really good with kids. Whatever the reason, there are a lot of benefits to dating someone you’re not initially attracted to.

For one thing, it can help you to broaden your horizons and expand your definition of what is attractive. You might find that you’re attracted to their intelligence or their sense of humor. Additionally, dating someone you’re not initially attracted to can help you to develop a deeper and more meaningful connection. When physical attractiveness fades, you’ll still be left with a strong connection built on trust, respect, and shared interests.

So, if you’re considering dating someone you’re not physically attracted to, don’t let initial appearances fool you. There may be a lot more than what meets the eye. Here are a few good reasons to date someone you’re not physically attracted to:


1. They may have an amazing personality. Just because someone isn’t your type doesn’t mean they don’t have a lot to offer. They may be kind, funny, smart, and caring. So don’t write them off just because of the way they look.
2. They may be good for you in other ways. Maybe they challenge you intellectually or help you to grow in your faith. Sometimes the best relationships are those that help us to become better people.
3. You may end up being surprised by how attracted you become to them over time. As you get to know them better and see all the wonderful things about them, you may find yourself becoming more and more attracted to them: both physically and emotionally.
4. Physical attraction can change over time. What you find unattractive today might be quite attractive to you a year from now. We are ever-changing beings and constantly change our opinion and develop over time. Try not to be closed-minded and be open to various factors than may attract you to an individual.
5. Looks can be deceiving. Someone who may not seem physically attractive at first glance could actually turn out to be quite beautiful once you get to know them better. If you connect with someone on a deeper level, you may find that they are far more appealing than someone to who you’re initially attracted, but don’t have much in common with.


So don’t discard someone just because they’re not your usual type. They could end up being the best thing that ever happened to you!

Lastly, some food for thought. Research has shown that couples who are less physically attracted to each other tend to have more stable and satisfying relationships. One reason for this may be that they are more likely to place higher importance on other factors such as mutual interests, compatibility, and trust.

Additionally, couples who are less physically attracted to each other may also be more likely to appreciate one another’s inner beauty and unique qualities. So, if you’re looking for a lasting relationship, don’t write someone off just because you don’t feel an immediate spark. They may just end up being the perfect match for you.

Reasons against dating someone you’re not physically attracted to?

Physical attraction is a key element of any relationship. If you’re not physically attracted to your partner, it’s likely that the spark will fizzle out eventually. Additionally, physical attraction is important for maintaining healthy intimacy. If you’re not physically attracted to your partner, you’re probably not going to be very motivated to get intimate with them.

This can lead to frustration on both parts, you and your partner’s end. You may end up finding yourself constantly wishing they looked different, which can lead to discontent and unhappiness. After all, if you’re constantly comparing your partner to other people who you find more attractive, it’s only natural that you’re going to start feeling resentful.

This can potentially lead to a toxic relationship, where both parties feel they are not gaining much from this relationship. You will always feel you’re compromising and missing out. On the other hand, your partner shall always feel they are not enough which will lead to low self-esteem and confidence on their part. Inevitably, this can create a vicious circle of resentment where both individuals feel trapped, underappreciated, and undervalued.

Furthermore, there are plenty more reasons why you might want to think twice before getting into a relationship with someone you’re not physically attracted to. Here are just 5 of them:

1. You’ll Always Be Comparing Them To Others:

If you’re not physically attracted to the person you’re dating, you’ll always be comparing them to other people. Whether it’s in your head or out loud, it’s not fair to them and it will eventually weigh on the relationship.

2. The Physical Connection Is Important:


A lack of physical attraction can lead to feelings of insecurity and low self-esteem. If you’re not attracted to your partner, you may start to question your own worthiness and desirability. A relationship without physical attraction can be incredibly frustrating. You may find yourself constantly thinking about what you’re missing out on and wondering if there’s someone better out there for you.

3. You won’t be motivated to make an effort:

When you’re not physically attracted to someone, you won’t be motivated enough to make an effort for them. That means you won’t be as inclined to dress up for dates or put any extra effort into your appearance when you’re around them. Over time, this can make the relationship feel stagnant and unfulfilling.

4. Intimacy will be unsatisfying:

A relationship without physical attraction is also likely to be sexless. And even if there is intimacy, you will constantly feel repulsed and more like it’s a sense of duty and obligation, rather than for your own pleasure. And let’s be honest, physical intimacy is an important part of a healthy and happy relationship.

5. Difficult to stop focusing on physical flaws:

It can be tough to ignore physical flaws. When you’re not physically attracted to someone, even small physical flaws can start to bother you over time. If your partner has a habit of not brushing their already huge and bushing eyebrows that repulse you or if their breath isn’t always fresh, it’s going to be harder to overlook these things than if you were physically attracted to them.

The bottom line:

Overall, there is no right or wrong answer to this scenario. It depends on what factors in your life you prioritize or put emphasis on. On the one hand, it is important to be attracted to your partner in order to have a healthy and enjoyable relationship. On the other hand, attraction is not everything.

There are many couples who start out as friends and then develop a physical attraction over time. So, if you are considering dating someone you’re not initially attracted to, it is important to ask yourself whether there is potential for the relationship to grow and develop into something more.

Only you can answer this question, but it is something worth considering before you take the plunge. Just be sure to keep an open mind and give them a fair chance before making your decision. In the end, trust your judgment and stick with it, no one can know you and what you want better than your own self.

You can think of checking this article out of how physical attraction can play a big role in creating the illusion of an immediate inexplicable connection between two people.

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