It’s human nature to make assumptions about others, especially when we’re in a relationship. We unconsciously assign meaning to our partner’s words and actions, and those meanings often reflect our own insecurities and fears.
So if you believe that your partner thinks the worst of you, then you’re at the right place. This article has been written specifically for you and for anyone in a similar situation. So read on!
5 steps to follow when your partner thinks the worst of you:
1- Consider if it’s just your imagination:
If our partner says or does something that bothers us, it’s easy to believe that they did it on purpose, and that they must think the worst of us. This can create a self-fulfilling prophecy, as our negative expectations cause us to act in ways that will confirm our partner’s negative opinion of us.
But, ask yourself why are you expecting your partner to be so horrible to you? If they truly think the worst of you, then why are you not more in shock and disbelief about it? Doesn’t feel like something you’ve been expecting and almost wishing for?
Take a step back, and ask yourself if it’s just your imagination and insecurities materializing, or if your partner truly has a low opinion of you. It’s important to remember that everyone is imperfect, including ourselves. So maybe you expect your partner to have such a low opinion of you so anything they do or say is an excuse for you to prove yourself right.
If we can give our partner the benefit of the doubt, believe and expect that they’re better then; we may be surprised by how different things can be.
2- Have a chat with your partner about their needs:
No one likes to be accused of something they didn’t do, especially by the person they love. It can be hurtful, confusing, and frustrating all at the same time.
If your partner is constantly doubting you or telling you directly that they’re thinking the worst of you, it’s important to try to talk to them about it. Find out what they’re lacking and why they’re getting frustrated with you. There must be underlying reasons for it.
Maybe there’s something they need from you but cannot face it or are in denial about it themselves. Find out what it is that they need, it could be that they just need some reassurance or attention from you. Either way, open communication is key in any relationship. If you’re not able to talk to your partner about this issue, it may be time to seek professional help.
Getting couple’s therapy together can help you both learn how to communicate more effectively and work through any trust issues that may be present. It can also help you see each other’s positives and good qualities which will improve your opinion of one another.
3- Strengthen your bond as a couple:
If you’re in a relationship, it’s important to be able to trust your partner. But what if you feel like they’re always judging you and if your partner assumes the worst of you? This can be really tough to deal with, especially if you feel like you’re constantly being put on the defensive.
One of the best things to do about this is to try and strengthen your bond as a couple. Having your partner constantly think the worst of you speaks volumes about how little they know you.
In fact, if your partner keeps assuming the worst of you, maybe it’s time to work on getting closer and strengthening your bond as a couple. This way, they can come in touch with the good side of your personality and see that you’re capable of having very good values and qualities too.
4- Make sure both of you are willing to compromise:
If you find yourself falling short when it comes to meeting your partner’s standards and expectations; then no need to beat yourself up about it. Instead, explain to your partner that you’re willing to try your best and do more to make them happy; provided that they can do the same.
See if they’re open to hearing your perspective and try to come up with some compromises that will help you both feel more comfortable. It’s true that it can be tough to compromise and find a middle ground if they’re always accusing you of being the worst.
Maybe they think you don’t show them enough love, attention, and support. Or maybe they straight away think you don’t care about them when really you’re just dealing with your own stuff. Whatever the case may be, it’s important to remember that we all have flaws and shortcomings. Nobody is perfect, and that includes your partner.
If they are constantly thinking the worst of you, try to make them see that they have flaws too. The only difference could be that you’re more tolerant of their shortcomings than they are of yours, so don’t hesitate to emphasize that. So ask your partner to be more lenient with you and meet you halfway, because if they cannot stand you to such an extreme extent then it’s ridiculous that they’re even with you.
If things still aren’t improving, it might be time to consider whether this is a relationship that’s really right for you.
5- Believe in yourself and stay confident:
If your partner actually believes wholeheartedly that you are the worst, don’t fall into the trap of questioning yourself. Their mistrust is a reflection of their own insecurities and self-doubt, not an accurate assessment of your character. This poisonous attitude can be destructive, leading to a loss of confidence and self-esteem; which can stay with you for life.
If you find yourself doubting your own worth, remember that the person you’re with could simply be incompatible with you. Maybe, someone else will see in you and bring out of you the best possible character and manners you ever had!
So perhaps, your partner’s lack of faith in you says more about them than it does about you. That’s why you must focus on maintaining your own sense of self-worth and don’t let their doubts bring you down. Most importantly don’t let a relationship that could end tomorrow or the week after, from the way things are looking, define your worth or affect your confidence forever.
In the end, you can also check this article on what to do when your best is still not enough in a relationship and you may find the answers you need there!