When your partner starts taking you for granted…

Feeling like your boyfriend is taking you for granted is one of the worst things in the world. A relationship should be reciprocal, so if you’re constantly making your boyfriend feel loved and special, he’s supposed to make you feel the same way if he cares about you the same way. 

If your boyfriend is taking you for granted, that’s a big red flag that needs to be addressed because it points to an issue in the relationship. Why is he taking you for granted? Does he think you’ll be there for him no matter how he treats you? If so, he’s disrespecting you and something needs to be done. 

What to Do If Your Boyfriend Takes You for Granted

1- Talk to Him About It:

The first thing you need to do is address the issue and talk about what’s bothering you and why. So, gather your thoughts and prepare to express your feelings in a way he can understand. Remember, this isn’t a conversation you should start while you’re upset or angry. Try to be as calm as possible so communication can be productive. 

Talk about how you feel like he’s taking you for granted and provide a few examples. This conversation is not about placing blame, but about expressing yourself and your needs. If he didn’t realize what he was doing, he will try to do better now that he knows he hurt your feelings and your relationship will be stronger. 

2- Reevaluate Your Relationship:

If your boyfriend becomes distant and he stops treating you with the love, consideration, and respect that you deserve even after you’ve been open about how you feel, it’s time to reconsider your relationship. Don’t sit around wondering if he will change. If you’ve talked to him about your needs and he refuses to improve or make a compromise, don’t waste time trying to force him. 

It’s not realistic to be in a relationship where you’re the only one making an effort and being considerate of the other person’s feelings. You deserve a lot better. Take control and stop prioritizing him. There is plenty of fish in the sea and you deserve to be with someone who appreciates you. 

3- Mirror His Behaviour:

If your boyfriend is taking you for granted and you’re not ready to have a conversation just yet, you can try mirroring his behavior. If he’s distant and he doesn’t have much time for you anymore, focus on yourself, your life, and the activities that bring you joy. When he does come around and decide he has time for you, that’s too bad because you already made plans. 

This is just an example, of course, you can mirror any kind of behavior that makes you feel taken for granted. When he feels the cold, perhaps he will come around to having a conversation. If not, the relationship will fizzle out and that’s probably for the best. 

4- Don’t Give Him Anything He Hasn’t Earned:

Sometimes, when we’re in love, we give so much of ourselves without stopping to think about whether or not the other person has earned it. Now, there’s nothing wrong with giving your love and attention freely, but if they’re being taken for granted, you have to take care of yourself and redirect your energy to doing for yourself more. 

Don’t give your boyfriend anything he hasn’t earned; not your time, love, affection, care, or respect. Relationships don’t have to be one-sided because what you have to give is too valuable to waste on the wrong person. You’re not in his life to tend to his every need while he neglects yours, make that clear. 

5- Consider Taking a Break:

If you want someone to stop taking you for granted, you have to stop taking yourself for granted. So, consider taking a break and don’t give your boyfriend all your time, love, and attention like it’s nothing. Take a break from him to get some perspective and focus on yourself once again. 

Live your own life instead of trying harder to see if he comes around. Don’t waste your energy! Focus on the things that bring you joy, work on yourself, spend more time with family friends, etc. Do whatever you need to find yourself again and realize how valuable you are. If he can’t see that, that’s his loss!

The bottom line:

When you allow someone to take you for granted, you’re saying “this is what I deserve.” But that’s not true! You deserve so much better than that and you have a right to get as much as you give, especially from your boyfriend or girlfriend. If you’re unsure about whether or not you’re being taken for granted there are a few signs that can help you figure it out.

So, if he’s neglecting you and your feelings, you can talk to him about it and see if things change. If nothing changes despite your best efforts, you can move on from the relationship knowing you gave it your all. 

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