Lately, it seems like all your friends are settling down. They’re getting married, buying houses, and having kids. And you don’t understand what’s the rush. It’s not that you don’t want those things for them, but you just don’t want to stay alone and single as it makes you stand out almost in a negative light and you’re just not ready yet for a committed relationship either.
In fact, you used to think you’re still young and there’s so much you want to do first, but out of nowhere, you see all these people that are your age jump into serious relationships already.
You want to travel, explore new careers, and just generally experience life. But now it’s almost as if your friends are putting pressure on you indirectly by settling down and choosing to tie the knot a bit too early for your taste. So what does one do in this type of situation?
Reasons not to feel conflicted if all your friends are settling down:
1- Everyone progresses in life at their own pace:
One day, you notice that all your friends are settling down suddenly. They’re getting married, buying houses, and having kids. And you can’t help but wonder why. It’s almost like you stopped having single friends years ago but now you’re running out of unmarried friends too, so does that mean you’re too old to be single?
And if on top of being single you’re still living in a rented apartment. Does that mean you’re behind in life? Not necessarily. Everyone progresses at their own pace in life.
Some people are ready to settle down in their early twenties, while others don’t even consider it until their thirties or later. Hell, if we’re gonna follow that logic then some people are becoming self-made billionaires like the founder of Snapchat: Evan spiegel, in their twenties! Does this mean you’re behind because you’re not one by your thirties?
Hopefully, this last example shows you how crazy and toxic comparing to others can be. There’s no right or wrong answer for when it’s the right time to get married. So if you’re not ready to settle down yet, don’t worry. You’ll get there when the time is right.
2- You’re not in competition with others:
If your friends are “saying yes to the dress” or whatever tv reality programs call getting married, it doesn’t mean that they’re leaving you behind. It’s natural to feel a bit left out and like you’re progressing at a slower pace in life, but try not to compare yourself to others.
As mentioned earlier, we all progress at our own pace and in our own time. There’s no need to rush into things just to prove a point or catch up with others.
In fact, the worst you can do to yourself is to date “anyone” just not to be single or what’s worse: marry anyone just not to be single. It would be a catastrophe waiting to happen! You’ll settle down when the time is right for you and not a moment sooner.
So don’t put yourself in a competition with your friends; just enjoy watching them from the sidelines for now.
3- You will get there and it will be worth the wait:
If all your friends seem to be settling down these days, then you better believe your time will come too. In fact, it’s important to remember that you will get there too when your time comes as this will allow you to be happy for them, the same way you’d want them to be happy during your wedding day.
But, until you get there enjoying single life cannot be all that bad. There’s no rush to settle down, and you’ll be glad you took the time to experience all that life has to offer before you make a vow to only ever be with one person forever.
So don’t worry; your time will come, and you will regret not having made the best out of your last days or months being single!
What to do if all your friends are settling down?
If all your friends are settling down, it’s important to be happy for them as we mentioned earlier. You probably would’ve wanted them to be happy for you too if you have been lucky to find the one before they did.
So if they’ve found something that works for them and that makes them happy, it should make you happy too. Just because they’re settling down doesn’t mean you have to do the same thing or unfriend them in real life. Focus on your own priorities instead and what makes you happy, for now. If you don’t have a partner or you’re not ready to settle down, that’s OK.
But if you’re ready to settle and just waiting for love to come your way then make sure you’re not dodging it, by adopting one of these unconscious bad habits listed in this article. So, in the meantime make sure you take this time to focus on yourself and do some things that make you happy.
This is also a great time to practice some self-care and self-love and focus on your well-being as it is a known matter of life that love comes when we expect it the least.
So treat yourself to a nice dinner, get a massage, or buy yourself a new outfit. Do whatever makes you feel good and enjoy your own company. Being single can be liberating and it’s important to remember that just because your friends are settling down doesn’t mean you’re on a deadline to do the same as soon as possible.