Marriage is a huge step in any relationship; it’s a public declaration of commitment, love and intention to spend the rest of your lives together. It’s also a big change from simply living together or dating and all of a sudden, there are new responsibilities and expectations.
And for some men, this can be a tough adjustment to make and a major milestone in their life. They might not be ready for the level of commitment that marriage requires, or they might not be used to shouldering so many responsibilities and pressure associated with the label of marriage.
This inevitably can lead to changes in behaviour both positive and negative. If you’re wondering, why men change after marriage then you have come to the right place. Read on. Here we will provide you with 5 reasons why men change after tying the knot.
5 Reasons why men change after marriage:
1) Courtship overlay:
In the early stages of dating, most men are on their best behaviour. They put their best foot forward and try to impress their potential partner. However, once they have secured a commitment from their partner, they often feel like they can relax and be themselves.
This phenomenon is known as the “courtship overlay,” and it explains why some men seem to change after marriage. The courtship overlay doesn’t mean that men are deliberately trying to deceive their partners. Rather, it’s a natural consequence of the way we form relationships.
Most people want to be loved for who they are, not for who they pretend to be. So, when a man feels like he can finally be himself around his partner, it’s not surprising that he may act differently than he did during the courtship stage. Of course, this doesn’t excuse bad behaviour after marriage. But it does help to explain why some men seem to change after tying the knot.
2) More Responsibilities:
Once a man gets married, he suddenly has a lot more responsibility than he did when he was single. He’s not just responsible for himself anymore; instead, he’s responsible for his wife’s happiness and financial well-being too.
This can be a big adjustment for some men, who might not have been used to budgeting or being thrifty with their money. Suddenly, they have to think about things like mortgages, college funds for kids, and retirement savings. It can be a lot of pressure!
Additionally, married men also often take on more responsibility, becoming the primary breadwinner and possibly also taking on more chores and child-rearing duties. Some men find this transition to married life to be overwhelming and stressful. It can take time to adjust to these new expectations.
But with time, for most men, once they have found their feet and solidified their role in the marriage; it can be a wonderful thing that brings new meaning and purpose to their lives.
3) Their social life changes:
Thirdly, most men spend a lot of time with their friends before they get married. They may go out for drinks or catch a game together every week. But once they tie the knot, their social life changes dramatically. They suddenly spend less time with their buddies and more time with their families.
This is often because they want to please their wives and make sure that their needs are being met. While it may take some time to adjust, many men find that they enjoy spending more time with their spouses and children and appreciate the stability and support this brings.
And though they might miss their old friends, they usually end up forming new relationships with other couples and families. So, while marriage may lead to some changes in a man’s social life, it doesn’t have to be a bad thing. It can lead to you having new friend circles and a fulfilling environment; where your wife and children are integrated into your social life.
4) No longer the centre of attention:
After getting married, husbands can often feel like they are no longer the centre of attention. For many men, this can be a tough pill to swallow. After all, they are used to having all eyes on them.
They were the ones who always got all the girls, all the attention and all the glory. But now, things have changed. Now, all eyes are on the wife. She is the one who gets all of the attention and all of the glory. And for many men, this can be tough to deal with. Not only are they not used to it, but it can also make them feel like they are no longer good enough.
In their minds, they compare themselves to their wife and they come up short. As a result, they can often become withdrawn, Moody and resentful. If you are married to a man who is going through this, it is important to be understanding and patient. Remember, this is a tough transition for them and they are likely doing the best that they can. With a little time and patience, things will eventually get better.
5) Their wives can be the ones wanting them to change but for the better:
After marriage, men often change but it doesn’t mean that it’s necessarily a bad thing. In fact, many men change for the better, especially if they’re pressured and guided in that direction by their wives. They want to be better husbands, fathers, and partners. They give up bad habits and become more focused.
They also start to communicate more effectively. All of these changes make them better men, overall. And it all happens because their women want them to change. They want their husbands to be the best that they can be. Now, women may not come right out and say that they want things to be different, but they may make subtle changes in their behaviour or attitude that indicate they’re not happy with how things are.
While there’s no guarantee that every man will change for the better after marriage, for many men, the desire to be a good husband and father is enough to motivate them to do that. This will be enough to make them want to make positive changes in their lives. So, if you’re wondering why your man has changed since getting married, now you know. It’s all because you wanted him to and he was willing to be different and try his best to please you.
Don’t forget that there are many stages that marriage goes through and that alone can make partners display different behaviour and character through each. So if you’re interested in learning more about marriage stages and phases and how to navigate each; then check this article out.